What Happens to the Love in Your Marriage After Baby - What the Last Year Has Taught Me About Love

Just over two years ago, I wrote a post titled What Happens to the Love After You Get Married. This is still one of my favorite posts to date! Love looks different in every relationship and can take on unique traits in every stage of life. Marriage has taught me that love is so much more than the mushy stuff and butterflies in your stomach. After Bensen was born a year ago, love took on an even deeper meaning. From day one of recovery to his first birthday this past Tuesday and every day since, I've taken a step back at different moments and though, 'If that's not love, I don't know what is.'

Related: How to Keep the Romance Alive Postpartum

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Love is...

...your husband helping you out of bed, to the bathroom and back during your postpartum recovery in the hospital. I found myself relating SO much to this article when I read it a few months back, even though I didn't have a C-section. Recovery was far from romantic, but I don't think I've ever loved my husband more than when he was selflessly serving me in that way.

...sharing in the burden of middle of the night wake-ups, no matter the reason your child is awake. Just yesterday morning, Bensen woke up at 4am crying and I got up to comfort our poor teething baby and get him back to sleep. At 5am, it was Joe's turn, and when he noticed that Bensen had a fever and knew that we'd used the rest of the Tylenol before bed, he drove to the store at that early hour and bought some more, no complaints.

...my husband calling me in the middle of scout camp just to say hi! It was the longest amount of time that we'd ever been apart and the hardest part about it wasn't that I was taking care of a newborn on my own for a week, but that Joe had zero cell phone reception and we couldn't communicate on a regular basis. When my phone rang and a random number popped up, I almost didn't answer it, and I was almost in tears when I realized who it was on the other end. That moment was a butterflies in the stomach, twitterpated kind of moment.

Related: Five Tips for Successful Family Date Nights

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...Joe encouraging me to push on through my last three semesters of school so that I could graduate this month. In order for this to happen, he's sacrificed his nights and taken on a lot of responsibility for Bensen while I'm gone to class and my internship. (More on this next week.)

...holding hands as you fall asleep because it's the only time that you have to spend together and connect some days. It's realizing that when life gets crazy, you may not have time for meaningful conversation and quality time together every single day, but that doesn't mean that you can't make the effort to connect in any way possible.

...making date night happen at home even though you'd had something really fun planned because the baby is sick.

Related: Couples with Young Children Need This in Their Marriage

marriage after baby

Love is caring about and making each other a priority no matter what life brings your way! Love is selfless, patient, thoughtful and kind. Love is a lot of little things rolled into one and not all of those things are necessarily romantic. Sometimes the most unromantic, rough things in life show the most love. Love will grow and evolve into something better the same way your marriage and family will grow and evolve throughout life.

Photography by Kayla Brooke Photography

What happens to the love in your marriage after you become parents?