Welcome to Married Life - June Edition

Welcome to married life, a glimpse into life at our house, the random things we do, the funny moments we have and the best of our conversations over the past month.

While on a walk one night, Joe reached over and smacked his hand on the side of my head like he was killing a mosquito.
Me: "Ow!"
Joe: Smiles at me "There wasn't a mosquito, I just wanted to slap you."

After I'd dished up a bowl of ice cream, which never happens in our marriage because ice cream isn't a dessert that tempts me, except now. Postpartum food cravings have been brutal guys...
Joe: "Wife, let me tell you the rules. When you're dishing up ice cream and you're the first one to dig into a new carton..."

My husband has rules for everything..
Joe: "Can I use your computer for a minute?"
Me: "Just ignore my millions of tabs that are open."
Joe: (imitating me) "I'm doing homework!"
Joe: (reading off my tabs) "Gmail, blog, FB timeline, Pinterest, Amazon, Blogger and Phone Scoop"

Joe waters the new sod in our backyard every night and insists on leaving the back door open while he does it. As a result, even if we keep the kitchen lights off, there are always random moths and bugs inside.
Me: "There are so many bugs in our house!"
Joe: "Do you love it?"
Me: "No!"
Joe: "They're like free pets!"

We decided to take Bensen's soothie pacifier away and try one of the normal orthodontic ones to see if it would stay in his mouth better.
Joe: "Not only does this promote a healthy mouth, but it helps with psychological development as well."
Me: "What? How does sucking on a piece of plastic help with psychological development?"
Reads the package. "It says physiological development, that's a lot different than psychological."
Joe: "I like psychological better."