The Perks of Being Married to a Target Security Guard

Being married to Joe is always an adventure. I love so many things about him and some of those things that I love have to do with the things that he's chosen to pursue in life. This series will share some of those roles he plays and the ways they've benefited me as his wife!

perks of being married to a security guard

The Handcuffs
Joe's job requires him to carry handcuffs, and because he's been a mobile employee, he always brings them home with him. I can't tell you how many funny moments we've had because of them. You'll usually find them sitting on a cupboard or table around the house when Joe isn't at work. I never think much of it until people come over. Without fail, even though everyone knows what Joe does for his job, people always point them out and awkwardly ask what they are for. Do they look pink and fuzzy to you? They're real, you can try them if you don't believe me. Just make sure Joe's around to unlock them before you do.

If he forgets to take them out of his pocket after work and we are out and about, they end up in my purse. One night I forgot to take them out when I got home, and still had them in my purse at church the next day. While I was teaching a group of teenage girls, I rummaged through my purse to find something, and pulled out the handcuffs instead. I promise I don't regularly carry handcuffs around.

The Knowledge
I know more about organized retail crime and the type of people who steal than I ever thought I would. Before I met Joe, I thought that the people who stole from stores were all dumb teenagers and that they took candy bars, lip gloss, and other stupid stuff just to prove that they could do it. I've since learned that there are people who steal for their job. They have a system, they steal really random things, and they don't necessarily hide those things on their person when they're stealing them.

I've learned that there is no stereotype to a thief, it can be just about anybody; age, race, gender, and economical background have no limits when it comes to stealing. I've learned that committing this crime doesn't always mean that you're taking merchandise from a store without paying for it. I've learned what behaviors security looks for in people and I try to avoid those so that nobody watches me shop on camera because that's just awkward. I've learned that when I'm shopping with my husband and he randomly disappears to start sneakily following someone suspicious, it's best to keep shopping and let him come find me because when I stand there and wait for him to come back, I get strange looks. I've learned that eating the food I plan to purchase while walking through the store is technically stealing.

And the most random, non security related lesson that I've learned is that the more people shop on Black Friday or late on a holiday night like Christmas Eve, the longer the store hours become on those days and the more time retail employees are forced to spend away from their families. It was annoying enough having to sleep by myself all night on Black Friday morning and hang out away from home while my husband slept all that next day our first year of marriage. Now he leaves family parties early on Thanksgiving and I take Christmas Eve dinner to eat with him in Food Ave. while he's on his lunch break because he has to work until the store closes late at night and the two or three people shopping decide to go home.

He wears a women's size medium in case anyone was wondering ;)

The Passion
Watching my husband work makes me love him so much more. There have been a few times when I've gone to meet him after work or he's found work while we're out shopping and I've gotten to observe how he does what he does. He has a talent for reading people, doing what needs to be done and quickly dealing with a situation so that it doesn't get out of hand. When he's in his element, he's having fun and you can tell that he really loves what he does.

The Convenience
This perk is purely selfish. Having a husband who works in a retail location every day is extremely convenient. On average, I probably call or text him three times a week with a list of things that I want him to bring home. And just as often, he calls to tell me about something that he found on clearance that we need to have or texts me the DPCI number for a product so I can look it up online and see if it's something that I'd like to have. The employee discount isn't bad either!

What are some of the perks of your husband's job?