A couple of weeks ago, I talked about why relationship education is important to participate in throughout every stage of your marriage. Another way that you can continue to learn and grow as a couple is to learn from other couples around you! One piece of advice that I hear given to newly married couples on a regular basis is to surround yourself with like minded couples. The idea is that if you have couples around you who feel the same way about marriage as you do, your relationship will be lifted up and you can encourage each other!
I am constantly looking for couples around me, to interact with and learn from! I wanted to share with you, a few ways that you can make your marriage relationship even stronger by learning from other couples around you! I hope that this post will help you recognize the good marriage habits that others have, and how you can incorporate them in your own lives.
Disclaimer: No two people and no two couples are the same. Please don’t expect your relationship to look exactly like somebody else’s! And don’t feel like you need to apply the things they do to your marriage in the exact same way! Take what you love and find a way to make it work for your marriage. I’ll share more thoughts and examples about this below!
Learn from Other Married Couples Around You
Make couple friends who prioritize their marriage
I think this is the biggest one! If you are regularly spending time with other couples or even other wives/husbands who complain about their marriage, and don’t give their spouse the attention and respect that they deserve, that attitude will start to rub off on you, no matter how much you think it won’t! Alternatively, if you are spending time with women who love their husbands and talk positively about them and their relationship but aren’t afraid to share struggles and ask for advice or share the ways that they’ve overcome, you will be inspired to make your marriage better, love your spouse harder and work through your problems in a healthier way. Take note of those people in your lives who encourage your marriage and those others who might diminish its worth, then try to spend more time with the ones who make you excited about where your life is now and how great it could be!
Join a marriage group in your area
This isn’t something that we’ve done personally but I know a lot of couples who have! Local churches or communities will often host groups for people in various stage of life, and one of those is for married couples. The great thing about these groups is that you know that you are walking into a room full of other individuals who want to work on their relationship and make it better. There will be a variety of situations and levels of connection between the couples you meet and everyone will be in a different stage, but this can be beneficial for everyone involved! You’ll find strength and encouragement from some of the couples who have been where you are, and you’ll be able to lift up other couples who are going through things that you’ve been through before. Both situations are good for your marriage and will help you grow as a couple while reflecting on how far you’ve come together already!
Ask couples you admire what their secret is
If you see a couple doing something that you know could make a big difference in your relationship, ask them about it!! Maybe you know a couple in a similar stage of life who is able to make more time for date night than you can seem to find. Ask them what they do, I’m sure they’d be more than willing to share how they got to where they are now! If you know an older couple with a really strong relationship, ask them what they would say is the secret to keeping your marriage strong and keeping the romance alive throughout various stages in life. Whatever your situation is, find a couple you look up to who has really rocked a similar one in their marriage and ask them about it! Not only will you learn some great tips, but I’m sure you’ll find that while they look perfect on the outside, they’ve still had their challenges and have had to work to overcome them.
Listen to podcasts
I’ve shared a list of my favorite marriage podcasts before and I am constantly adding to it as I discover new ones! The great thing about podcasts is that the host generally interviews other people on the topic that they discuss. If you find some quality podcasts about marriage, you are going to hear from a wide range of couples who are experiencing many different things in their lives and have valuable knowledge, suggestions and resources to share that could benefit your marriage as well!
A lot of people are experiencing marriage for the first time, and all of us have to learn and adjust and find what works for us! Some couples aren’t able to make it work, and even though it might seem like they’ve failed, they still have valuable lessons that they can share with other couples around them on what worked until they stopped doing it, or what they wish they would have done differently. Find a way to learn from every single couple around you! And remember to use what you’ve learned and tailor it to fit your marriage and the two of you as individuals. Your marriage will be stronger the more work you put into it, and you’ll never regret the things that you decide to do!