Use the Love Languages to Give the Perfect Gift

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Do you ever feel like your spouse or other loved ones in your life are the most difficult to people to purchase gifts for?  I used to listen carefully all year long and make note any time Joe mentioned anything that he wanted. Sometimes I'd get him a gift that I thought he'd enjoy only to be disappointed that he wasn't as excited by it as I thought he would be. I don't remember when it happened, but one day I started thinking about gifts that I could give based on his love languages and ever since, I've never lacked for ideas.

The great thing about using someone's love language to pick out a gift is that it lets them know that you care about them and know who they really are. I like to try and get Joe one thing for each love language, even if it's just something small. My main gift is usually focused on his top love language but I work really hard to hit them all in a way that I know he'll appreciate. It's so hard for me to wait to give Joe his gifts because I'm so excited by what I come up with to give him!

Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and other special occasions that warrant a gift, think about your spouse's love language! I've got some ideas below to help get you started. You can apply this concept to everyone in your life, not just your spouse, but this list is mostly spouse focused.

Words of Affirmation

Write a love letter - Make it sappy, memory filled and praise your spouse for who they are as a person and their accomplishments. Put your letter in their stocking, give it to them on their birthday or leave it on their pillow or somewhere that they'll find it.

I Love Us book - A fun journal to share your feelings with your spouse.

Love Letter of the Month Club - This would be fun for an anniversary or at the beginning of a new calendar year. Super perfect if your spouse's love language is Words of Affirmation, and especially if it's not one of your languages. It will help you be more intentional about speaking their language on a regular basis.

Open When Letters Kit - I'm in the middle of putting this one together for Joe and I'm really excited to get it finished and wrapped! There are a lot of fun prompts, add ins and embellishments in this kit.

Receiving Gifts

Something they've been wanting to buy - This is where keeping a list of things that your spouse mentions wanting throughout the year comes in handy. I have a secret Pinterest board and a secret Amazon wishlist with ideas for Joe. I've also started one for my kids and add things that I know they'd love based on their current interests.

Money toward something they want - Joe was saving for a handgun for a couple of years so every special occasion, I'd give him an envelope with a picture of the gun he wanted on the front and some cash inside. Now he has a specific meat smoker and a tv on his wishlist, so I'll probably start giving him a little cash toward that on special occasions.

Flowers  - Husbands, I can tell you that there is nothing that would make your wife happier than receiving a flower delivery at work or at home while you're at work. She'd also love a bouquet hand delivered by you at the end of the day! Joe purchased flowers for my flower bed this year for mother's day and I loved it because they lasted all summer long.

A gift card to their favorite store - Maybe you know your spouse would like something nice for themselves but you aren't quite sure what to get. A gift card to their favorite clothing, home decor, sporting goods or other store is perfect!

Acts of Service

Get someone to clean the house - Someone once asked me if his wife would be offended if he bought a gift certificate to have someone clean her house. This would be my ultimate gift, so I told him no. Cleaning the house relieves stress for me, but having a messy house causes stress. With a full time job and two kiddos, my life is busy and a lot of times, the deep cleaning is something that doesn't happen as regularly as I'd like. 

Coupons to have you do something for them - What's one thing that you know your spouse hates to do or appreciates when you do for them? Deep cleaning the car, cleaning out the garage, taking care of the grocery shopping, etc. Put together a cute coupon letting them know that you will take care of that thing for them.

Do something - I didn't know how else to explain this one. Example: I love having a beautiful flowerbed but I hate planting and caring for the plants. For Mother's Day this last year, I mentioned that Joe bought flowers for me, but he also planted them, watered them every night and pulled weeds. We got wave petunias because they grow to take up the entire bed and they lasted from April through the end of October when we pulled them up.

Physical Touch

A massage - You could get a gift card or give them a massage yourself.

Other spa services - Pedicure, manicure, facial, etc.

Bath bomb - Gift them a bath bomb and then draw a bath and provide them with an opportunity to use it one night.

Sexy Subscription Box - A DIY monthly box that you put together to gift to your spouse. The divas provide you with everything you'll need, you just fill the box each month and deliver it to your spouse. Need I say more?

Quality Time

Date Night - Whether getting out for date night comes easy or rarely happens, it's a great gift and a great opportunity to connect! You could give your spouse a simple gift card to one of your favorite restaurants, purchase tickets to a play, musical or concert, or plan and pay for day date or an extravagant night out. Get creative and plan something that you know the two of you will enjoy, maybe even something from your date night bucket list!

52 Weekly Date Night Ideas - This makes an AWESOME gift! Date ideas for every week of the year, all put together in a picture album so that after you go on the date, you can put a picture of the date and write some memories down to go with it.

Open When Date Box - I love this spin on the Diva's Open When Letters. Another DIY subscription for more intentional and meaningful date nights in the coming year.

The Perfect Staycation Kit - One of the best things that Joe and I do for our relationship is to get away together for a weekend. Right now, that's a little harder with a new baby and a busy toddler, so a little staycation will have to do.

Year of Planned Dates - I see so many great ideas for putting together a year of date nights for your spouse. You could plan and pay for gift cards, tickets, etc. and put together date night envelopes like Camille from Friday We're in Love does, or you could put together a magazine collage of the date that you'd like to go on each month and pay for them as they come. I also love the Year of Dates Binders from Dating Divas. They're already put together and planned for you, or you can order just the labels and plan and put everything together yourself. They have the basic Year of Dates Binders, Year of Sports Date Binder, Around the World Date Nights and Envelope Date Night Kits. All of them are perfect for putting together a fun year of quality time with your spouse. If you're feeling really ambitious, you could do them all!

A Night Away - Getting away for the night or a weekend is one of mine and Joe's favorite things to do. We always come back a million times more in love and our relationship feels so refreshed. For Christmas this year, I plan on giving him a gift card to our favorite getaway location, along with a collage of pictures of what I have in mind for us to do all weekend. With two little ones, we look forward to that time away and having one planned will give us something to look forward to, even if it's a few months away.

Your spouse doesn't have to be a receiving gifts to enjoy getting a gift from you. Just keep the love languages in mind and you'll be able to find something to gift your spouse that they'll love and remember for years to come.

What would you add to these lists that you know your spouse would enjoy receiving based on their love language?