There are a few different, big disagreements out there right now about current events that people believe are ruining families and the definition of marriage. I have my own personal opinions about most of them, but those aside, I feel like there is a much bigger issue facing families today, one that is tearing them apart at the foundation. I'm sure most, if not all of you, have heard about the Ashley Madison hack and information leak last week. It's been all over the internet, you can't really get away from it. I first heard about it because some of my friends on social media were sharing a story about a well known family advocate whose name had been linked to accounts on the site. My first initial thought was disgust. I realized that I'd heard about sites like this existing before, but had chosen to brush them from my mind, and I was even more disgusted. The prevalence of this type of behavior makes me sick to my stomach.
I understand that a lot of the news about this scandal has revolved around one particular individual, but there are so many families out there who were affected by the leak. I'm sure there are even more families out there who still don't know that the ones they love are seeking love elsewhere. I'm willing to bet that there are other sites like this one and there are plenty of people out there searching for the same thing who aren't using websites or social media. Don't quote me on any of this because I haven't bothered to do any research, why would I? The whole thing leaves me fuming any time I hear about it. A radio station I listen to did a teaser for their show this morning saying that they'd be talking to a man who found out his wife was having an affair because of recent events. That ten second teaser made me angry all over again.
I have been told that a lot of the accounts were fakes, that the company bought e-mail addresses to create profiles to draw business in. Honestly, I don't think that matters. The number of actual accounts is trivial to me. If there had been only one account tied to a real life individual, I would still be upset about it. The fact is, there are people out there actively seeking to ruin the relationship that they have with their spouse. There are people who aren't taking that commitment seriously. I don't care what your story is, or why you think you should be able to justify it, ADULTERY IS NOT OK. It isn't fair to yourself, the person you commit it with, your spouse, your children, or your extended family. Think about how many people are going to be affected by your choice.
It may be bad to say, but this is one security breach that I am somewhat ok with. You think you can keep something like this a secret, but for most people, that secret will eventually come out. There should be no secrets in your marriage. Little secrets in marriage lead to bigger secrets, Ashley Madison sized secrets. Secrets are dangerous, don't keep them. If you're having problems in your marriage, talk them through. The more you talk about the things that are difficult to talk about, the easier it will be to bring them up and the more open you will be with each other on a regular basis. Those difficult conversations are usually the most important ones to have.
The real threat on our families and the definition of marriage are things like Ashley Madison; Sites that encourage unfaithfulness to a spouse; People who tell you that it's ok, your spouse will never find out. A strong family is built on the foundation of a strong marriage. There are so many things in the world that threaten to tear the family apart, but infidelity is one of the biggest. Where is our commitment and loyalty? Where are the people who take their vows seriously and truly want to be with that person they married, and only the person that they married, for the rest of forever?
Marriage isn't always going to be easy and it isn't always going to be sunshine and roses. Marriage is hard work and it takes a lot of dedication and unconditional love. But marriage is worth it! Marriage should be a place where both parties can feel safe and secure. Infidelity, unfaithfulness, affairs, they're all the same thing and they all rock marriages and families to the foundation. It's something that I wish didn't exist, and it is, in my opinion, the biggest thing out there that is threatening our marriages and ultimately, our families. There are too many people in my life whose lives have been turned upside down because their spouse wasn't true to them. My heart aches for anyone who has been in and will be in the situation that so many families across America are in following last week's events. The real threat to our marriages isn't a change in definition, it's people who don't take marriage seriously and are making a joke out of the sacredness that the rest of us treat it with.